"Treat a man as he is and he will remain as he is; treat a man as he can be and he will become as he can and should be." - Johann Wolfgang von Goethe
I was enduring a "terrible tantrum" phase with one of my children when I asked my mom how she managed this when we were young. She said that it was not even a question. When they took us out, good behaviour was simply expected. We lived up to that expectation.
Mom and Dad did not discipline us. They simply expected the best from us. You did not want to be on the receiving end of "that look." Not a word was said. You just knew. They knew you were capable of better. That is what they expected. Not perfection. Just our own personal best, which was perhaps a little better than we thought we were.
Whether it was schoolwork or getting along with people, the bar was set high. We were treated as we could be ... and we became as good as we could and should be.
I have an amazing group of supportive people in my life. I have done and been asked to do some things that I did not feel capable of doing. But because people saw me as I could be, I became as good as I could and should be.
My children are growing and grown. I would be lying if I said parenting was as easy as Mom's words of advice, where your children were simply as good as you expected them to be. But after all is said and done, they have are becoming as good as they could and should be.
I am presently in the business of raising other people's children, for 10 hours of the day, five days of the week. I asked myself the question "Am I treating them as the children they can be?" When a child is labelled as a follower, an instigator, quiet or loud or anything in between do they live up (or down) to that label?
I have walked through the day with a renewed perspective. It has been challenging, but I am doing my best. I am treating myself as the caregiver that I have the potential to be, in the hopes that I will become as good as I can and should be.
Treat yourself and the people in your world as the person they have the potential to be, in the hope they will become as good as they can and should be.
