I live in a bubble-wrapped world. I am surrounded by people who encourage, support and listen to me. The only people within this world who challenge me are under the age of four. I'm not pushed out of my comfort zone often (except when it comes to that very same-age demographic).
I wake up to a predictable and safe little life that pretty much goes as expected, day after day after day.
Do I make mountains out of molehills within this quiet little life of mine when the going gets tough or when I instinctively know I need to be challenged and live outside my small little box? When little things feel big, are they really "that big" or are my day-to-day challenges so small the little things are getting me down?
Last night, I listened to Brené Brown's weekly pep talk from her Daring Greatly course and she spoke to me. She reiterated what Shonda Rhimes was trying to tell me as I was reading the book Year of Yes (yes, I hang out with some pretty cool people, don't I?). Brené told me sometimes we feel like we want to stay down where it is safe and cozy. We know we are not going to get hurt when there is nowhere to fall. The problem with that is we feel most alive when we are being brave. The thing is, most of us can't tolerate staying down so long because we stop feeling alive. We stop coming out and connecting and trying new things. The heavy, low-grade depression that can be created when we "stay down" is less acute than a fall, but more miserable over time.
These aren't Brené’s exact words, but they are her thoughts and wisdom and I am in no way taking credit for what she is saying, but when I heard this I knew this was exactly the reason I can't maintain my "happy" lately.
I know I need to be brave. I know I need to challenge my limits. I know I need to create some excitement by trying new things and pushing myself.
I know my happiest times have correlated with "picking myself up after a fall.” Or when I've tried something brave and new. This low-grade depression has always been a springboard for me in the past. Lately, I have been too fearful, too overwhelmed and too lazy to push myself where I know (and where Brené and Shonda keep reminding me) I need to go.
I have printed off Christine Kane's article on 66 Ways to Build Your Courage. I circled 22 of Christine's suggestions. I could list them down right now but I think it is more important to do them and write about them later.
I need to rewire and reroute my thoughts. I am not sure if my trouble is that I am thinking negatively or if it is more of a case of thinking too cautiously. I am making excuses for myself. I know I need to ask for what I need and create some breathing space within my life. I need to make room for growth. I need to act bravely again.
I have a feeling if I make some proactive moves within my life, my body will stop craving sugar and sleep to the extremes they have hit. I believe I have been numbing my sadness and smallness with food and sleep. I fall asleep the moment I stop eating which is telling me one of two things. Either I am very, very tired. Or I am not inspired and energized by what I am doing.
It is time to take these thoughts, dust off my armour and enter the arena again. I'm sick and tired of listening to my own thoughts. They have been on a loop and keep repeating themselves time and time again. My good friends Brené and Shonda are tired of listening to my excuses.
I can do this. It is time to start a new chapter. I'm tired of living in my safety net. It's time to step back onto the high wire of life and take a chance. I don't have to start at the top. I'll work my way up there. Would you like to join me?
Click here (http://christinekane.com/66-ways-to-build-your-courage/) to go to Christine Kane's 66 Ways to Build Courage post. Print it off. Circle at least five suggestions. You can do five. I'll bet you could tackle eight! Come and join me on my adventure. I promise to write all about it and I would love to hear your stories as we make our way in this Brave New World together.
