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The ring

Life As I Know It
Colleen Crawford

When Mom and Dad were married, it was for forever. People kept the promise "’til death do us part" in that generation. When Dad placed the wedding band on Mom's finger on their wedding day, it was on for life.


Mom never removed her ring. It is a thin band of gold that is part of a two-ring set. She removed her engagement ring when baking bread, painting or any kind of dirty work. The gold band remained on her finger. Always.



Mom lost the diamond out of her engagement ring. At the time, it would have cost at least as much to replace the diamond, as it would to get an entirely new set of rings. The gold band remained where Dad had placed it all of those years prior. And they bought a new set of rings for her to wear, in addition to the original band of gold.



Eventually, Mom had a garnet put into her original engagement ring and kept it many more years.



There came a time when she gathered all of her adult children together. During our visit, she went through her jewelry box and gave each of us something that was precious to her. She gave me her original engagement ring, the engagement ring Dad had given to her and placed on her finger. I was awe struck, to have been given such a precious gift.



We spoke of other things at the time, such as her wedding band. She specifically told us she wanted to wear it forever. Of course this was her decision to make and hers alone. We all knew the story of the band of gold that was placed on her finger forever. And forever it would remain. We honored, respected and wholeheartedly agreed with her choice. We knew it was the right thing to do.



I love the story of that most simple band of gold that has remained on Mom's hand from the moment the words "With this ring, I thee wed" were uttered.



Now, we live in a day and age where bigger is better when it comes to engagement rings. We live in a disposable society where marriages rarely last forever. There is much too much energy spent on the size of the diamond in the engagement ring. There is so much status given to a set of rings which may or may not stay on that finger forever.



When people talk of engagement and wedding rings, my mind always returns to the gold band Dad placed on Mom's hand on their wedding day. A day that was not full of the pomp and ceremony of today's weddings. A personal vow made in front of Dad's brother and Mom's sister. The promise they made was to each other. It was made for forever. They meant what they said. That simple band of gold symbolized their promise and that ring remained on Mom's finger.



Remained, yes, past tense.



A few birthdays ago, I received a bulky card from Mom in the mail. I assumed she had found a unique card that explained the bulk.



I don't even know if there is a word to describe what I felt when I opened her card and found her original wedding band enclosed.
My heart cracked a little. That ring was hers. Forever. And she entrusted "forever" to me.



It was the most precious gift I have ever received, second only, to her engagement ring that comes off my hand only for repairs.



I was already blessed and I knew it. This was almost too much.



There is no gem in this world I would trade for this simple band of gold and all it symbolizes to me.